FEEDBACK SAMPLE
"The Twickenham Murders"
The director of The Twickenham Murders wanted to receive honest feedback for his independent short film.
You can watch the film below and read a sample of the feedback the filmmaker received below, or you can read the feedback in Excel.
FEEDBACK #9
Age - 22
Gender - Male
Profession - Freelancer
Did you like the film?
Not really
Anything you'd like more of?
Going into the film knowing that it was placed in the genre of horror, I was expecting a lot more scares and tension than what was given. The film overall, apart from a jumpscare sequence, felt more like a drama or a crime-thriller, and so I think the horror tag was a bit misleading. This was a shame because I think the jumpscare sequence was quite well done and did make me jolt, so I would have loved to have seen a deeper exploration of these techniques for the film.
Were there any moments/scenes you particularly liked? (Please list and explain)
My favourite part of the film was by far the jumpscare sequence. I thought the sound design (cutting the music when the machine was opened and keeping the ambient noise as the only source of audio until the scare) was very effective and well done. I didn’t fully understand why he was down there or why he was apprehensive of the washing machine but I appreciated the tension and technical aspects of the film all the same. Also, another thing I really liked about the film were the locations, especially the outdoor ones. They really added to the realism of the piece and created some gorgeous imagery on screen throughout.
Were there any moments/scenes you particularly disliked, or felt didn't work? (Please list and explain)
I personally don’t think the final scene of the film was as effective as it could have been. The main reasons behind this was the lack of detail in the characters and their motivations. We see the main character, Oliver, throughout the film investigating these deaths but we don’t know anything about him other than his name and it’s difficult to understand why he has chosen to investigate them, even though the police and the radio presenter regularly label the deaths as suicidal and not to be treated suspiciously. Why does he think differently? On top of that, how is he able to find bits of evidence that the police missed, such as the scrap of cloth? Does he have a prior skill set with investigation that we should be aware of?
With the secondary character (Clyde, I think his name was in the book Oliver has), why is he starting conversations with Oliver when we later found out that he thinks he’s a murderer? It seems like a big risk and we don’t know why he’s taking it. Also, what is his relationship with Oliver? (he knows his name, so I assume they have a prior relationship) Are they friends? Enemies? The final reveal of the film has the potential to be quite effective if we know the characters and grow to care about them. As it was, the twist wasn’t powerful because we can’t relate to characters we know nothing about.
Were there any moments you felt annoyed or frustrated by the movie? (Please list and explain)
I never felt annoyed whilst watching the movie, it never once felt like it was insulting my intelligence as an audience member. It presented information and seemed to have the trust that I would be able to follow along, which was good. A slight frustration did come with one line delivered by Clyde, however, which was the line “Do you like my new trainers?” In the context of the story and the conversation the two characters were having, there was no lead up to this statement or any reason for him to say it. It felt random. I guessed ahead of time that is was going to be used later in the film as a plot reveal device, which was frustrating because things that happen in the film should be for the sake of the story and plot, not for the sake of the audience.
Were you confused at any given time? (Please list and explain)
Overall, as mentioned previously, I was confused about the motivations of the characters, which I’ve explained. When it comes to the film itself, there was a moment at the end of the film where Oliver picks something up behind the door with the bloody doorknob. I couldn’t see what this was because of the lighting in the scene and how it played into the flashback of the trainers. I’m guessing it was one of the trainers, but I wasn’t sure because I couldn’t see it.
How would you rate the following elements? (1 to 5)
Please explain your rating.
The Beginning
4/5
Reason
The opening scene was intriguing and raised questions for the rest of the film to answer. The only reason I didn’t rate 5 was because of the usage of a radio news report as the form of exposition for the deaths, which has been used a lot and is a bit cliche for crime films.
The Ending
2/5
Reason
The music created tension well and the film was obviously hitting a climax from the use of the audio and visuals. However, the impact of the ending wasn’t as strong because of the lack of character and character motivation detail which resulted in me as an audience member being unable to understand the characters and care about them. While the twist could have been effective, it was let down by the confusion of how the characters got to where they were and why.
The Music
3/5
Reason
The music, and sound design of the film overall, was brilliant and well crafted. The music always reflected the emotions of the scenes and was used in a way that it complimented what was happening on screen and didn’t overpower it. If I had any critique for this section, it would be to fine tune the audio of the actors, as sometimes their dialogue wouldn’t sound convincing in the location they were stood.
The Pace
3/5
Reason
The pace was built up well throughout the film, and seemed to be obviously leading towards a climax between the two characters and a reveal of the cause of the deaths. However, it was almost brought to a dead stop by the radio announcement that the police had stopped their search for the murderer. It felt like this was trying to further the tension for the character but it didn’t feel like it was in the right place directly before the climax of the film. As an audience member, I had begun to calm down and expect a lower tension scene to follow and was surprised when we were then taken to the house of the suspected murderer for the climax. It felt like there was something missing in between.
The Story
1/5
Reason
For me, I struggled to engage with the story because I had no idea why the characters were doing what they were doing and how they got to that point. Even the police’s assertion over the radio about the deaths being suicides confused when the causes of deaths were drowning. I understood the wounds were reminiscent of that of a suicide victim, but why would they cut themselves and then drown themselves and why would the police not ask the same question?
I think the story has some points with strong potential, such as the idea of the main character being a murderer and being unaware of it, resulting in them chasing themselves during the investigation. It’s a tried and trusted plot and it could have made for an entertaining film if it was set up well, but the lack of character detail stifled it.
The Drama
3/5
Reason
The tension created in the film for the main character was really well done, resulting in my favourite part of the jumpscare moment. The drama between the two characters seemed genuine, as if they were old enemies, but I wasn’t entirely sure why, which weakened it a bit. Overall, the main reason I haven’t rated 5 was because there wasn’t a major obstacle for the main character to overcome, which resulted in a lack of major drama. Throughout the film, he seems to be finding things and writing in his book, but there’s nothing stopping him or making his job difficult.
The Characters
1/5
Reason
I really struggled to understand the characters, in terms of who they were and why they were in the situation they were in, and I came out of the film knowing very little about them. More detail, even small details such as mentioning what someone’s job is or how old they are, would have really helped to heighten the believability and relatability of the characters.
Any other comments or feelings about the film?
The only other bit of advice I have about the film which I could find a place for in this review is to be careful of warp stabiliser. At certain points in the film, such as at timecodes 00:44 and 02:51, the warp stabiliser was too high and distorted the image quite noticeably, which pulled me out of the film a bit.